Dear 19-Year-Old Clang,
Yes! You are almost done with college!!! And I know you are so hyped to work, earn, move out and live a more independent life. Most especially you can’t wait to have freedom. I just hope and pray you will become stronger and wiser as time goes by because, the world out there is obviously not as what you imagined. But I tell you, moving out of your home, will build a better relationship with your mum and dad.
You’ll start working, you’ll deffo struggle at first, but hey, I promise you’ll get the hang of it. You’ll start living alone and you’ll leave in a small room because you are just a poor fresh grad gal looking for a decent job. And knowing how independent you are, I know you’re not gonna ask even a penny from your parents, or maybe a little just enough to start up a life of your own but not too much to afford those wide space flat. So unfortunately you’ll be living in a room smaller than yours wayback home. But hey! That’s fine and normal coz you’re just starting.
You’ll pretty enjoy the city life because city life gives you the freedom you ever wanted; You’ll enjoy meeting people, making friends with them, hanging out with them. You’ll enjoy morning the night partying coz I know you never experienced it during your college life. You’ll really enjoy living your life. But. I know one day you’ll miss it- you’ll miss living with restrictions, you’ll miss asking your mum or dad’s approval for anything you will be doing, you’ll miss the hate you feel when asking permission and get declined, you’ll miss your mum’s nags, your annoying brother, your dad’s loud music, you’ll deffo miss the comfort of your own home, you’ll indeed really miss home.
At some point you’ll think of going home and ditch adulting for a couple of months, but I know you’re far from doing that, because if you’ll not have your self experience those things now, then when? You’ll cry yourself to sleep because you are home sick, you’ll feel lonely, but that’s part of this whole independence thing- you’ll feel sad, you’ll struggle a lot until you’ll learn how to deal with it and the next thing you’ll realize is, you’re handling it pretty well. It just really a matter of getting used to it.
Let’s not forget those boys and men you’ll meet along the way and will hit on you. There are 2 kinds of male in this world- the boys and men. You’ll prolly fall in love with boys coz they are the playful and challenging ones, usually and prolly girls of your age will fall inlove with. But I need you to be careful, coz you’ll definitely lose control of your feelings, you’ll deffo fall for their sugarcoated words. So always. ALWAYS. Remember to love yourself more than you’ll love someone you’ll meet along the way and always have the attitude to put your mind over matter. You’ll come to a point where you’ll decide to focus on bettering yourself and eventually you’ll learn a lot and grow as an individual. You’ll spend 2 years (sorry for spoiling hehe) of traveling to beautiful places and exploring what’s good and bad in life. You’ll also make tons of “different friends”, brace yourself because when I say “different friends” it includes the bad ones. You’ll really enjoy life, the life of being single and not rushing at all. And just when you learn how to love your self more and be contented and patient, God will put someone in your life who walks the same path and heads to the same direction as yours, someone you’ll never expect to give love a whole new meaning in your life. Yes! God knows so muuuch about the right time for you, yeah? He’ll be someone who’ll make you realize why your past relationships didn’t work out. All those heartbreaks in the past will finally make sense. And most especially, you’ll realize how is the word “lucky” such an understatement for meeting such a wonderful man. Coz it will make you feel more than it- it will make you feel… SO much blessed.
You’ll then snap yourself out of that fairy tale setting you built up in your head. Coz dang! Adulting is harder that you’ll ever imagine. You’ll even question your own existence at 3 a.m like “ What to do in my life?” or “Where am I heading?”. Believe me, as much as I want to prepare you for this, I couldn’t. I, myself don’t even have any idea of what’s gonna be my 3 a.m thoughts, not until this very day. You’ll be wiser- wiser enough to figure out and separate people who are worth keeping from people who need cutting out of your life and why put them on that place in your life. You’ll also realize how important it is to have a small group of true friends than to have a bunch of junk ones.
In 5 or 10 years you’ll look back on the last ”woah” years of your life and realize how much has frikin changed. It’ll really be quite a bumpy ride, but I tell you it’ll be frkin uhmaaaaazing! You’ll look back on that very day on how you’re so inexperienced with life. And it will bother you of how everything is going so fast. But hey! Do you believe that time flies really fast when having fun? Of course you do! ;)
Your best frenemy,